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Relationships

The Appeal of the Dirty Weekend

Put it down to the crisp hotel sheets, the anonymity or the fact that you don't have to do any chores afterward, but sex in a rented room holds a certain cache. Upscale hotels, in particular, with their room service, luxury bedding, marble bathrooms and the absence of nosy roommates or inquisitive kids can be the setting for a weekend of sizzling passion.

Experts agree, including Dr. Jessica O’Reilly, Playboy TV sexologist and host of the @SexWithDrJess podcast. O’Reilly warns that couples in long-term relationships can become over-scheduled and exhausted, leading to a sex drought. The cure, however, is easy enough. Just a little break from the normal routine can inject some spontaneity and surprise into an otherwise mundane sex life.

“Escapism is an important element of sex and switching up your environment, even just for a few hours can reignite desire, passion and even sexual response,” she says. O’Reilly explains that in order to become aroused, our ‘Sexual Excitement Scale’ (which differs from person to person) needs to override our ‘Sexual Inhibition Scale.’ Things that can make us feel sexually inhibited include the mundane interruptions of life like worrying about your kids walking in on you or feeling stressed out over work issues.

It’s easier to forget those distractions when you are away for a mini vacation, especially as you can simply hang the ‘do not disturb’ sign on your door. It also helps that hotel rooms are physically uncluttered and somewhat anonymous. If you can't see the laundry pile, your kid’s toys or hear your laptop pinging with work emails, it's easier to relax and concentrate on your partner. Being in a hotel also allows us to get a little louder than we might dare at home where neighbors or people who share our home might hear. Not only are hotel rooms often soundproofed, but even if someone does hear, who cares, you'll never see them again anyway.

O’Reilly says that being vocal can actually make you feel even more aroused. “Allowing your noises to flow without inhibition can encourage healthy breathing patterns that facilitate your body’s sexual response cycle and orgasm,” she says.
Hotels are often designed with sex in mind, the bed is the central focus of the room, there is an abundance of mirrors, and some of the furniture can even become props with a little imagination.
Evan and Susan Money from Rancho Palos Verdes, California, have been married for more than 20 years and have a wedding ceremony every year in a different state or country. They have seen their fair share of romantic hotels and are up to wedding night 23 and counting. They both find that hotels and vacations, in general, are very conducive to great sex and keeping relationships fresh and exciting. Evan points out that it isn't only the actual time spent in the hotel that contributes to heightened arousal. “The best part is in the anticipation, seeing the date on our calendar way ahead of time, then the excitement builds as we get closer,” he says.

Even packing your bag for a dirty weekend away can be thrilling, especially if you pack a few sexy extras like lingerie or sex toys. Mona Darling from Portland, Oregon, runs BDSM mentoring programs and retreats for women and was a professional dominatrix for 20 years. She conducted many of her sessions in hotel rooms and knows exactly what to pack for a good time, including an over-the-door anchor to create a makeshift suspension point. She aims to create a sexy den by trying to address all the senses. Spraying fresh scents, making a playlist of sensual sounds and adjusting the lighting to create the perfect intimate ambiance.

Darling says that hotels are often designed with sex in mind, the bed is the central focus of the room, there is an abundance of mirrors, and some of the furniture can even become props with a little imagination. She shares one of her secrets with Playboy: “That hotel chair? It usually has a hook in the back that holds the cushion in place. It can be a handy restraint point for bondage games.”

Once the morning beckons and you check out of your hotel and return to your normal life, are you saying goodbye to your weekend of inhibition-free wild sex as well? Not necessarily, says Dr. O’Reilly who offers this advice to keep those good feelings going once you get home: “Leave your phone, laptop and other work items out of the bedroom to reduce distractions. Clear your room of clutter and images that don’t make you feel sexy. These will vary from person to person, but they might include photos of your in-laws or children.” She also suggests that the bedroom should remain a tranquil sanctuary, free from distractions and stresses of everyday life.

So are you ready for a naughty weekend of hotel sex? Check out these ultra-luxe hotels with a few kinky surprises:
Heading to Europe? Check in to the Provocateur Berlin Hotel located in the Kurfürstendamm shopping street in the Charlottenburg district of Berlin. This property has merged all the chic Parisian style of the Moulin Rouge into a sensual German city hotel. The 58 rooms and suites feature cozy red plush textures and a “provocateur ​mode" ​switch, which lets guests alter the mood by dimming the lights, playing seductive beats and sensual video art—setting the scene for a hot night of passion.

The Big Apple can be the scene of a sex-cation for you and your lover at the W New York-Times Square, especially if you reserve the Extreme WOW suite. The huge round bed is the star of this suite, but there are numerous other scintillating features including peepholes between sliding doors and a voyeur shower.

For a sexy weekend in the Windy City check into Virgin Hotels Chicago for an innovative room with separate sleeping and dressing areas that feature peep holes. So even if you order room service, you won't have to see another soul except for your lover. Lean over to your bedside cabinet, and you'll find an intimacy kit for purchase including a vibrator, lube and condoms. The two-person shower provides plenty of space to clean up or go for round two.

You’ll need to join the 150,000 other people who have already registered to be alerted when this concept hotel finally opens, and it will cost you $30,000 per couple for the week, but the Poseidon Undersea Resort is like no other hotel in the world. Planned on a private island in an undisclosed location in Fiji, this subterranean accommodation is like staying inside a giant fishbowl with all of the tropical marine life as voyeurs.